Empress Theresa (Style)

This page is an examination of the writing style found within Empress Theresa. This includes not only the style itself, but how Norman Boutin chooses to use characters, motifs, etc.

Norman Boutin has participated in a few writing forums, many of which banned him. Because the advice given in those forums were helpful, some of it will be used here, with sources quoted.

Story

Narrative

Norman Boutin chose to write his book from a first person perspective, since that was popular in the young adult (YA) market. However, he finds a problem at the beginning, where Theresa is supposed to be ten years old, and yet does not sound or speak like a ten-year old would. Instead, she sounds "several years older," as if the Theresa of the future is recollecting her youth. Her use of the phrase "I was cute as heck at age ten" further implies that Theresa is speaking from a future date, rather than telling the reader something which has just happened.

One noticeable trend of Norman Boutin is his tendency to info dump. At the very beginning of the book, the story "seems to actually start at the end of the sixth paragraph; almost everything previous to this is backstory." Much of the book, in fact, is needless exposition, or exposition which brings the story to a complete halt. One of the biggest offenders is the BBC report that Theresa watches after she wakes up in London; the narrative literally comes to a screeching halt as the reader is bombarded with exposition after exposition, and much of it details the reader does not need to know.

Description/Atmosphere

Description is something to which Norman Boutin is very hostile. He believes that, in order to cover as much of the book's events as possible, he has to "keep things moving along quickly." He also finds it absurd to describe major cities or other well known locations because "everybody already knows a lot about them." He believes that he should merely state plain facts and "leave the rest to the reader's imagination."

The unfortunate truth is that Boutin's hostility to description shows in his story. Events in the book often happen "very quickly," and with "very little description or atmosphere." The result of this is that the reader feels like "too much attention on the little things," but "not enough on big events," which makes the whole story "feel highly uneventful." One comparative example is how much time is spent describing the fox which hosts HAL, contrasted with how much time is spent a few paragraphs later discussing Theresa cooking bacon and eggs.

Plot Structure

Empress Theresa does not have a single or underlining story arch - that is, there is no concrete beginning, rising action, climax, falling action, and resolution. Instead, it is simply about Theresa gaining superpowers and then responding to a variety of world issues with them. Norman Boutin has outlined no less than fourteen tasks Theresa has to deal with:

1. Escaping from the jet fighter plane
2. Figuring out what HAL is and how he works
3. Getting control of HAL
4. Providing rain
5. Getting the world through the winter with a year’s crop totally lost
6. Keeping ocean levels under control
7. Preventing the oceans from overheating
8. Finding a new source of oil
9. Giving the Israelis 24 hour daylight
10. Giving the Israelis a way to evacuate Israel in one day
11. Providing a new home for the Israelis.
12. Taking control of a Boeing 747 and landing it
13. Liberating the North Koreans
14. Eliminating the threat of 200 new HALs

This causes the storyline to feel episodic in nature, which if done right can be entertaining (as with the films Time Bandits or Labyrinth), but if done wrong can make the reader feel bored. It makes one feel as if the story is going nowhere. It feels like one event leading into another event with no real connection or development.

This is compounded with Norman's distate for details and a desire to simply move from one even to the next. Some have suggested to Norman that he make the book a trilogy, in order to give the story room to breath. Norman, however, has said that he believes a YA audience would not read a trilogy, even though the book that inspired Empress Theresa, The Hunger Games, is part of a successful YA trilogy.

Suspension of Disbelief

Because Norman chooses to spend more time on minute details than on the important details, there are times where he fails to present a convincing case for unorthodox moments in the book. The most infamous example of this is when Theresa is permitted to keep a collection of coke bottles with her at all times, even when she is strapped into an F-22.

Characters

Mark Twain once said, of a story by Fenimore Cooper, that the person reading "dislikes the good people in it, is indifferent to the others, and wishes they would all get drowned together." This could likewise refer to the person reading Empress Theresa.

Character Development

If characters are "not significant characters in the story," Norman chooses not to develop them at all. For example, he would rather just say that Edward and Elizabeth Sullivan are "good parents" and leave it at that, rather than write them acting and behaving good parents and let the reader discover this for themselves.

Even with major characters, however, Norman violates the prime rule of "show, don't tell." He even begins the book itself with a long, formal introduction from Theresa, which offers no action and "is something that the reader can find out within the story, rather than having it told to them as simple fact." Instead of writing Theresa in such a way that the reader can discover her in the way you discover a person in real life, he simply tells the reader everything they need to know.

Compare this with an example of George R.R. Martin's development for the character of Roose Bolton in his A Song of Ice and Fire series:

Roose Bolton was seated by a hearth reading from a thick leatherbound book when [Arya] entered. "Light some candles," he commanded her as he turned a page. "It grows gloomy in here."

She placed the food at his elbow and did as he bid her, filling the room with flickering light and the scent of cloves. Bolton turned a few more pages with his finger, then closed the book and placed it carefully in the fire. He watched the flames consume it, pale eyes shining with reflected light. The old dry leather went up with a whoosh, and the yellow pages stirred as they burned, as if some ghost were reading them. "I will have no further need of you tonight," he said, never looking at her.

She should have gone, silent as a mouse, but something had hold of her. "My lord," she asked, "will you take me with you when you leave Harrenhal?"

He turned to stare at her, and from the look in his eyes it was as if his supper had just spoken to him. "Did I give you leave to question me, Nan?"

"No, my lord." She lowered her eyes.

"You should not have spoken then. Should you?"

"No. My lord."

For a moment he looked amused. "I will answer you, just this once. I mean to give Harrenhal to Lord Vargo when I return to the north. You will remain here, with him."

"But I don't-" she started.

He cut her off. "I am not in the habit of being questioned by servants, Nan. Must I have your tongue out?"

He would do it as easily as another man might cuff a dog, she knew. "No, my lord."

"Then I'll hear no more from you?"

"No, my lord."

"Go, then. I shall forget this insolence."

George R.R. Martin could have simply written "Roose Bolton was mean and creepy" and moved on, just as Norman Boutin would have done. Instead, he demonstrated this through Roose Bolton's actions and words. Readers, by and large, aren't stupid; they're able to understand what kind of person a character is by the way they act and speak. Even in the YA genre, readers are capable of understanding subtle character traits.

Relatability

Because of Norman's poor character development, most readers have found it difficult to relate with characters in the book.

Errors

Spelling

Spelling errors can be found throughout Empress Theresa, and this has been one of the most constant complaints from critics of the book.

Amazingly enough, Norman Boutin has defended his typos by committing the tu quoque fallacy.

Grammar

Grammar mistakes abound in Norman's book.